Get Rich, or DIE HARD!
by LittleManFromAcrossTheStreet
Summary: Good title right? No? Well forget yourselves, conservative scums! Anyway, this story is about John the Rottweiler and Sonic the Hedgehog... and company. They set out on an adventure to stop Eggman from taking over Mobius! Plus, John has a score to settle with Eggman. What is it you ask? Read and find out! Might have "lemony" goodness Please, criticism is welcome. My first story.
1. Chapter 1

**I did this mostly in school. I hope you like it and review. Other than that, enjoy!**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN SONIC THE HEDGEHOG & CO. SONIC THE HEDGEHOG & CO. ARE COPYRIGHTS OF SEGA CORPORATION. **

**CLAIMER: I OWN THE PLOT AND JOHN THE ROTTWEILER. JOHN THE ROTTWEILER SHALL NOT BE USED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED MY FELLOW LIBERALS. **

Known characters=abc

Thoughts/Flashbacks=_abc_

_(NOTE: To prevent thoughts and flashbacks from being mixed (if I even put in flashbacks), passages in the future will say "FLASHBACK" to differentiate the two.)_

Unknown Characters=**abc**

Author's Note=_**abc**_

Get Rich, or DIE HARD!

It was a beautiful day in New Mobotropolis where hedgehogs were walking to work, teens are tweeting friends and Brick making changes to better the economy. Yep, a beautiful day indeed. On the road, we see our infamous hero, John the Rottweiler, a person that is not a hedgehog re-color. He was wearing a white muscle shirt with a bulletproof vest over it, white khaki shorts, white Cadillac shoes, a white wave cap, and a white snapback to top it off. He was cruising through the streets in his beautiful white Cadillac Escalade with spinning rims and manually installed amps called: Beats by Dre. Yep, ruined his warranty alright. John stopped at a stop light, observing the scenery of the city.

"Ah, what a nice day to go out." John said.

All of a sudden, A MISSILE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND HIT HIS $74,655 LUXURY VEHICLE! His Truck was on fire. John unbuckled his seat belt and jumped out, just in time as it exploded in a fiery blaze. He got up from the floor to watch his hard earned money go down the drain. "WHAT THE FUCK?! MY CAR! NOW MY INSURANCE IS GONNA BE A BITCH! WHO DA NIGGA THAT FUCKED UP?!" John shouted on this beautiful day.

He saw a giant shadow consuming his surroundings; something is looming over him. He looked above himself and saw a weird lookin' ship with an even more weird lookin' face in front of it.

"It is I, Eggman!" said… Eggman. "People of New Mobotropolis, I have come to bring tyranny into your lives by taking over Mobius! And no one can stop me! AHAHAHAHA!" said Eggman over the intercom. John was furious. He wanted to fill his body with holes and see if gravy comes out because Eggman was about to take over the city. Plus, he lost his now fucked up Escalade.

John felt a rush of wind past him, followed by a sonic boom.

"Whoa, holy shit!"said John, surprised by something that made him twirl around 360 degrees. In front of him was a man. Not just any man, a mobian hedgehog man! The hedgehog was skinny but built. He has strong legs that can kick a guy's balls so hard, the pain will be greater than a woman giving birth. Oh wait, that happens no matter how hard you get kicked…. Ok, let's say you can die. Anywhore, he has eyes that are connected to each other somehow. He wears white gloves and shoes that are red with white stripes and gold buckles on the outsides. This is the longest description that I have given. So, I'm stopping here and making a new paragraph.

"**Eggman? I should've known you'd bring your egg-lookin' face here again"** said the unknown hedgehog. Eggman looked down below and saw the person that RUDELY interrupted him: the hedgehog man!

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Sonic the Hedgehog. The only thing that can defeat me in every freaking battle we have. I can't wait to take over this world then kill you! Robots, ATTACK!" Eggman said. With a hearty laugh, he pressed a button that lowered a hangar, sending out hundreds-thousands of robots that surrounded the mobian hedgehog man who is now deemed sonic. He stretched his legs like Goku.

John looked at the robots that were now deploying around him. "_Dammit. Got caught in the cross fire. But if this will get me to that fat guy…_" John thought, developing a plan in his head. John checked himself before thinking of fighting. He fixed the snap on his hat to tighten on his head, tighten his belt to make sure his pants don't sag, and tighten his shoes; tucking in his lases to prevent them from falling out. He pulled out a 9mm and a Glock 17 from the back of his pants and sat his arms on his sides. Look at 50CENT over here!

"Just another day at the office." They both said in unison as they prepare for battle. I hope they don't hit too hard…

END OF CHAPTER 1

_**Whats good people? If anybody is reading this, I would like to thank you for taking the time to read this work that I call a "masterpiece". I wanted to make this story to be filled with action, romance, tragedy, and most of all: humor. Please, click on the sexy button that says "review". Don't worry, it won't bite… I think.**_

_**Also, next week is my spring break. I'll make sure that I post another chapter on the day I'm off. Until then, see yall in 11 days!**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Sup people! Okay, I was supposed to upload this like umph-teen days ago. I'm sorry and I will not promise that this will never happen again in the future. Sorry my Liberal friends. That is all (until the ending) and ENJOY YOURSELVES!**

**DISCLAIMER AND CLAIMER ARE ON TOP OF CHAPTER 1.**

On the last chapter of Get Rich or DIE TRYING, sorry HARD!:

_FLASHBACK_

_-"Ah, what a nice day to go out."-_

_-A MISSILE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND HIT JOHN'S $74,655 LUXURY VEHICLE!-_

_-"WHAT THE FUCK?! MY CAR! NOW MY INSURANCE IS GONNA BE A BITCH! WHO DA NIGGA DAT FUCKED UP?!"-_

_-"It is I, Eggman!"-_

_-"I have come to bring tyranny into your lives by taking over Mobius! And no one can stop me! AHAHAHAHA!"-_

_-"Eggman? I should've known you'd bring your egg-lookin' face here again"-_

_-"Well, well, well. If it isn't Sonic the Hedgehog."-_

_-"I can't wait to take over this world then kill you! Robots, ATTACK!"-_

_-With a hearty laugh, he pressed a button that lowered a hangar, sending out hundreds-thousands of robots-_

_-"Dammit. Got caught in the cross fire. But if this will get me to that fat guy…"-_

_-"Just another day at the office."-_

_-"It's just the will… of a single man."-_

Ok, maybe not the last one.

_**John Presents**_

_**A L.M.F.A.T.S. Production**_

_**And J's Production story**_

_**Get Rich or DIE HARD!**_

Let's us continue. Shall we?

**CHAPTER TWO: ANOTHER CHAPTER**

"Okay, let's see. How shall I plan this and execute?" John thinks. Right now, he has 20 bots around him, all armed to the teeth with FALs, AKs and AN-94s and… What the fuck? Is Eggman cheap or some shit?

"_Hmm, let's see. I go for the bot in front of me and shoot em' in its head. Then use his body as a shield. Gun down two of em' bye my sides so I can have more mobility around the perimeter. Then, get one of the bodies as replacement body shield cuase' the old one will be shot up by that time. When I get it, I will shoot three more-"_

The robots move up closer to John. He has to execute his plan fast before they move up on him. John could do his plan instead of thinking it over for a period of time and think of how to get to the giant hovering thing of death. Unfortunately, he still thinks over his plan with his head down, not noticing the robots advancing on him.

"_-Then, I kill the last bot by stomping his head while fist pumping in the air. Okay, let's do this!" _John looks up to see the robots already around him. He has to think fast before they apprehend him. He shot two bots in front of him in the head AT THE SAME DAMN TIME! He quickly takes one of the bots as a body shield. He was under heavy fire by the bots counter-attacks. While under pressure, he thinks of what to do next… His body shield is giving way. "Shit! I ain't got no time for this! … ah!" John picked up an RPK and grenades that he failed to notice beside a downed robot and managed to mow down the rest of the bots in his way. He sighed as he dropped the giant piece of metal to the ground.

"…That was easy-"John said. Then, a robot came out of nowhere, heading towards him! John saw it just in time to duck; the robot cuts that skittle lookin' tip off his snapback as it passes him. John turns around and sees a little boy with beady eyes - about six or seven years old - about to be crushed and blown with the robot heading for him. Child endangerment makes me look me bad. So, I'm going to make John save him! John runs as fast as he could to get to the poor little guy. With The robot just getting there, John jumps as hard as his legs can force. He got to the kid (fast for a Rottweiler) and grabbed him before he was hit by the upcoming robot. John runs in slow motion…..EXPLOSION!

"OH MAH GAWD THAT WAS CLOSE!" John said, dropping' the kid on the floor.

"Thank you sir for saving me" the child said joyfully to his savior.

"Bitch! You got me doin' this shit for something that is easy to avoid?! If I see you again, Imma find your mom and be the worst step dad you ever had." John said as he looked at the child; pissed. The child hugs John by the arm while John looks at him with a 'WHAT THE FUCK?!' look. "Ew, Faggot!" John says before he elbows the kid in the face and runs away.

HEY GUYS! I forgot about our famous hero Sonic the mother fucking hedgehog. Let's see how he's doing. Is that okay?

-Wherever Sonic is-

Sonic sat on a pile of robots or SWATbots or whatever they're called and fist pumps as he triumphantly won the battle with "Champions by Queen" in the background. Now, all he has to do is reach Eggman and take him down again and fight another day! Until, John bumps and knocks him to the ground, making Sonic look like a major FAIL.

(Screech record)

"**Oh, Bro! My bad. I was running from kid that tried to molest me. You good?"**

Sonic looks up at the sky to see a silhouette blocking the suns view. The figure was a dog. Not just any dog. A Rottweiler with all white clothes on!

"What the fuck man! I was having a moment!" Sonic shouted, angry with our infamous hero.

"Well, I'm sorry for running towards you from a candy-givin' child. GOSH!" John countered at the hostile remark.

"What?" Sonic said, confused.

"A kid was about to be hit by a flyin' robot, which he could've avoided easily. But, he was being a little bitch. So I saved him and he hugged me; I said 'Ew Faggot', elbowed him and ran into you."

"…weird story" Sonic said, still somewhat confused.

"Thanks. Anyway, who are you?" John asked.

"Whats your problem?" Sonic countered.

"Hey calm down dude. Just askin' (hard-ass motherfucker)" John muttered. Hoping it wasn't audible. Will he not notice?

"…. My name is sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog! Your name my good man?" Sonic questioned the Rottweiler. I don't know if he heard him say that. But, at least he didn't say anything. Am I right?

"It's John" He said, somewhat enthusiastically.

"Full name" Sonic said, persisting to get his name.

"I stick to first names for a reason" John said, hoping it ends there.

"Okay, fine. I'll go with that. Anyway, I saw on how you handled those bots. You got some skills dude!" Sonic says, complementing our infamous hero on a job well FUCKING done.

"Ah, it ain't nothin'"

"What do you mean, man? You just showed those bots for a few minutes ago. With your guns and a bigger gun. That's kinda cool!" Sonic said, giving him a thumbs up.

"Thanks man. You know, you're a co-"

Just as John was about to finish, ANOTHER MISSILE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND HIT THE GROUND IN FRONT OF THERE FACES! The force of the explosion sent them falling back to the ground close to the left side of a building. John was the first to get up then Sonic, both of their ears ringing with surprise. From the shock that they experienced, they looked up to see where it came from…Just to remember that they are being invaded by Eggman. Everything set aside; they make the giant son of a bitch their first priority. FINALY! Anywhore, Sonic and John, now being a two man army since G.U.N. sucks ass and not being able to stop a fat blubber full of gravy, try to make a tactical plan that will help infiltrate the flying contraption and to take out anything in their way. But, that will come next chapter because my fingers are messed up from typing out this adventure of unfortunate events. SO WAIT YOU FUCKERS!

END OF CHAPTER 2

**Again, sorry for not putting this up sooner. I was being fat, lazy, and having no ideas whatsoever. Plus, life comes first… stupid economy. I'm sorry for doing this and I will not promise that this will never happen again.**

**ON THE NEXT CHAPTER OF "Get Rich, or DIE HARD!",**

_More random shit happens to the duo and tails might even be part of this stupid action/romance/humorous story!_

_**Until next time, this is L.M.F.A.T.S. and John Rottweiler sayin' thanks 'n' shit!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**_This will be my last message on my stories. I'm practicing on not to do this every time I post a new story and chapter. So, I'll post my "final Author Notes" on the last chapter of this story. Until then, this (and the bottom post) will be the last post on this story's, and future stories', chapters. Enjoy!_**

**DISCLAIMER AND CLAIMER ARE ON TOP OF CHAPTER 1.**

On the last chapter of Get Rich, or DIE HARD!,

_FLASHBACK:_

_-__"Okay, let's see. How shall I plan this and execute?"-_

_-Right now, he has 20 bots around him, all armed to the teeth-_

_-He shot two bots in front of him in the head AT THE SAME DAMN TIME!-_

_-"…That was easy."-_

_-John turns around and sees a little boy with beady eyes - about six or seven years old - about to be crushed and blown by a robot heading for him.-_

_-__"OH MAH GAWD THAT WAS CLOSE!"-_

_-"Bitch! You got me doin' this shit for something that is easy to avoid?! If I see you again, Imma find your mom and be the worst step dad you ever had."-_

_-"__Oh, Bro! My bad."-_

_-__"… My name is sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog! Your name my good man?"-_

_-"It's John."-_

_-"I saw how you handled those bots. You got some skills, dude!"-_

_-"Thanks man. You know, you're a co-" Just as John was about to finish, ANOTHER MISSILE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND HIT THE GROUND IN FRONT OF THERE FACES!-_

"_**It's too late to pologize."**_

-Timbaland

_**John Presents**_

_**A L.M.F.A.T.S. Production**_

_**A J's Production story**_

_**Get Rich, or DIE HARD!**_

CHAPTER 3: CHAPTER TITLE DOES NOT COMPUTE

Let us continue our amazing adventure.

-Back to where John and Sonic are-

John and Sonic try to make a plan to infiltrate Eggman's flying vehicular as Eggman destroys the city.

"Ok so, what I think we should do is launch ourselves up to that huge thing. I could use my power of music, and my SMAW, to do a super rocket jump to the station. I don't know about you though." John said, thinking of how to get Sonic to the DeathEgg or whatever that thing is called.

"Oh it's all good man. I got a ride" Sonic said, as he gave John a thumbs up. As he did this, a biplane passed over his head. John saw the plane land behind him. What John saw that was interesting was the two tails on the side of it. Trademark maybe? I don't know. He saw two figures come out of the vehicular. One of them was a fox with two tails and the other figure was a female pink hedgehog with a red dress, boots and a giant hammer by her side. When she set her sights on John, she thought that he was a threat. So she lunged herself, hammer at the ready.

"Get away from my Sonikku, you freak!" She said with anger in her voice.

"Now that's just cold." John said, feeling offended. Just as the hammer was coming to him, Sonic came by and got in the crossfire, being knocked out instead. The two-tailed fox heads over to John and the crazy hedgehog lady, now surprised that she hit her "man". Sonic had a giant knot on his head and his eyes closed with a weird face expression. The fox pulled out a bag of ice out of nowhere and put it on the spot.

He turned to the hedgehog, and looking very agitated while doing it.

"Amy! What did you do that for?! Did it look like Sonic was under attack by this guy?" The fox said, gesturing toward John.

"Well, sorry for me trying to protect my man from a complete stranger, Tails." Amy said.

Tails heads over to John and Introduced himself. "Hi! My name is Miles Prower. But, you can call me Tails. Sorry for my terrible friend here." Tails said as he turned to look at Amy. She looks at John. John looks at Tails then Amy. Amy looks at him, scowling at his appearance. John looks at Sonic. Sonic is in Happyland. John looks at Tails again.

"It's all good. I have crazy friends too. Especially ice cold ones. Anyway, my name is John. But, you can call me J. Nice to meet you Tails and Amy." John said as he shakes Tails' hand.

John, Tails, and Amy looked down as they see Sonic finally coming from his unconscious state. They circle around him as he opened his eyes and take in that eye killing light of the sun. "Ugh, so bright!" Sonic mumbled.

"Sonic!" Tails said, happy to see his friend still alive from that hammer blow.

Sonic finally sat up and looked at the trio. "What happened?" He asked.

"Meh. Nothin' much. You got slapped silly by a hammer, I met Tails and Amy, and I think Amy don't like me for some reason. That's it. Oh wait! You got a knot on your forehead too." John said. Sonic got up and felt the dark spot and regretted it. It hurt like a motherfucker.

"… Ow! What the- Amy!" Sonic Shouted, agitated with the pink hedgehog girl.

"Oh! Don't worry Sonic! I'll kiss it better." Amy said as she tried to get close to Sonic. But, Sonic stopped Amy with his hand.

"I already got hit with your AIDS infected hammer. Don't make it worse." Sonic said, still angry with the hedgehog.

"But Sonic-"

"Shut up, Cumdumpster! So, what are we going to do now?" Sonic said as he walked to the other two, leaving Amy to pout for a little while.

"Well, we can always take my plane and just fly up to the DeathEgg." Tails said as he gestured to his plane. Looking fine as always.

"Yeah…. Hehehe. Cumdumpster. HA!" John laughed at the insult that Sonic gave Amy. Amy looks at John with daggers.

"John, shut up or I'll reveal your weird story." Sonic said. The skeptical looking Rottweiler stared at Sonic.

"…Okay, I'll stop" John said, giving up on the non-winnable fight.

They all head to the plane and got ready to get to the DeathEgg. Hey! I was Right! It is called the DeathEgg! Yay!

To Eggman-

Eggman sits in his main control room as he sees the disaster that is being caused. "HOHOHOHO! This is fantastic! I am about to destroy all of Mobotropolis and take over! Yay! This calls for a partially pwning celebration! Eggman takes out a remote from his red jacket and pressed a button that says "play". He starts dancing to Earth, Wind, and Fire's "September" in a very 1970s fashion. Two robots, one gray and one yellow or somewhere around that, came through a slider door and see their creator dancing in a very 1970s way.

"Sir, realize that this is 2013 and not 1921. Okay? Swerve." The yellow bot said while the gray one got his lawls for the day.

"Decoe, you bitch! You're just hating on my evil genius swagger!" Eggman said as a comeback at Decoe.

"Nobody says "swagger" anymore, besides the ones that are lost in the present." Decoe said in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Like yo' mama?!" Eggman said as his terrible comeback for today.

"Yes, mother." Decoe said. the gray bot said OOOOOOHHHHH! As Decoe made a "get at me" look towards Eggman, taunting him.

"Grrrr. What did you two come here for anyway?" Eggman questioned.

"Ahem." Started the gray bot. "We came here to show camera footage of Sonic and co. And it looks like they have a new friend." The gray bot said. He slid a tape that says "Camera Surveillance 001" to Eggman's side of a table. Eggman took the tape, examined it, and put it in a DVR device. There was static in the first 2 seconds and the video showed Sonic and co and the new character. The character looked at Amy as she was close to hitting him with her hammer. Unfortunate for her, Sonic got in the crossfire and got knocked out in the process. Tails looked in disbelief as he head over to Sonic with an ice bag. He sets it on a very dark spot and nags at Amy. It was audible.

"Amy! What did you do that for?! Did it look like Sonic was under attack by this guy?" Tails said, gesturing toward John.

"Well, sorry for me trying to protect my man from a complete stranger, Tails." Amy said.

Tails heads over to the unknown character and Introduced himself. "Hi! My name is Miles Prower. But, you can call me Tails. Sorry for my terrible friend here."

"It's all good. I have crazy friends too. Especially ice cold ones. Anyway, my name is John. But, you can call me J. Nice to meet you Tails and Amy." John said as he shakes Tails' hand.

Eggman stopped the video to see the new character now deemed John.

"Hmm. A Rottweiler. And it's a big one. Must've gone to prison or something because he looks very threatening. Any records on him?" Eggman question while looking at the frozen screen.

"No sir. But, we will get the hackers to do it on your order."

"Accepted. Go get me the information on this "John" character and do not come back to this room until you have it. Now go." Eggman said. The robots leave the room and Eggman looks at the screen again.

"Welcome to the war, Mr. John." Eggman said in a very cold way.

He rewinds the tape to where Sonic was smacked silly by the hammer and watched it over and over again while laughing hysterically.

_**So, this will be my final author's note until the ending of the story. I'm starting to do it this way because I don't want to get in some kind of trouble for going against some of FanFiction's rules. Plus, this will help me in some way. Finally, be awesome and review my story. Just tell me what you think about the plot, wording, humor, etc.**_

_**Thank you for reading. L.M.F.A.T.S. is out for another day!**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**I lied about keeping Author's Notes to myself and I don't give a fuck.**_

_**Over 150 views? SSSSSSSHHHHIIIIIIIIIIT! Man! I love you guys, no homo. Thank you for taking the time to read my motherfuckin' work! Nothin' else to say but enjoy 'n' shit. So, enjoy 'n', you know, shit.**_

_**DISCLAIMER AND CLAIMER ARE ON TOP OF CHAPTER 1.**_

On the last chapter of Get Rich, or DIE HARD!,

_-John and Sonic try to make a plan to infiltrate Eggman's flying vehicular as Eggman destroys the city.-_

_-"Ok so, what I think we should do is launch ourselves up to that huge thing. I could use my power of music, and my SMAW, to do a super rocket jump to the station."-_

_-"Oh it's all good man. I got a ride"-_

_-__John saw the biplane land behind him. He saw two figures come out of the vehicular. One of them was a fox with two tails and the other figure was a female pink hedgehog with a red dress, boots and a giant hammer by her side.-_

_-"Get away from my Sonikku, you freak!"-_

_-"Amy! What did you do that for?! Did it look like Sonic was under attack by this guy?"-_

_-"Hi! My name is Miles Prower. But, you can call me Tails. Sorry for my terrible friend here."-_

_-__"HOHOHOHO! This is fantastic! I am about to destroy all of Mobotropolis and take over!"-_

_-"We came here to show camera footage of Sonic and co. And it looks like they have a new friend."-_

_-Go get me the information on this "John" character and do not come back to this room until you have it.-_

_-"Welcome to the war, Mr. John."-_

"_**No one man can have all that power."**_

_**- **_Kanye West

**_John Presents_**

**_A L.M.F.A.T.S. Production_**

**_A J's Production story_**

**_Get Rich, or DIE HARD!_**

Let's get back to the story.

CHAPTER 4: NOBODY AIN'T GOT TIME FO DAT

John, Sonic, Amy, and Tails get ready to infiltrate the DeathEgg vehicular in the sky. Tails got the plane ready as the others went up to it. John sat in the back, Sonic stood up on the right wing of the biplane and Amy tried to look for a spot, but did not find one. John, being the most epic gentleman ever, gave her a hand. "Here, sit on my lap and look pretty." John said, looking at her making a scowl look. Damn. Why is she bein' such a bitch? As I said, she looked at him with the same scowling look.

"No, I don't trust you." She said, looking away from him and the others. John got annoyed.

"Come on, woman! Tails and Sonic welcomed me to the group with open arms." John said, mentioning the awesome two tailed freak and the cocky blue son of a female hedgehog and unmentioned father that I believe is also a hedgehog.

"I'd rather sit on the wing than with you."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you Amy. Remember last time that you sat on the wing?" Sonic said.

Then, there was a wavy motion going through the picture and took them back to the time where-

"Hold up hold up. Is this going to take long?" John interfered, asking Sonic the question.

"Nah, it's about a minute."

"…Okay, continue."

Back to what I was saying, there was a wavy motion going through the picture and took them back to the time where Amy sat on Tails' biplane wing. Must've been a long time, because the flashback is in black and white, no vocals, and is playing ragtime in the background.

_**-FLASHBACK BITCH-**_

_(Scott Joplin - Maple Leaf Rag (Play one from Wikipedia; my suggestion))_

_**BACK IN THE DAY OF HUM, HUM, 3 THOUSAND MMM…**_

_Sonic, Tails, and Amy were flying back to the Mystic Ruins on Tails' biplane. Sonic was standing on the wing while they were flying, Amy sat in the passenger seat, and Tails flew the plane. Tails and Sonic were talking about what happened at the whoreho- I mean they were talking about the mission on Dr. Robotnik and taking out a roboticizer building. _

"_**-AND I WAS ALL LIKE 'See you later, Dr. Rofatfuck!' AFTER SMASHING THAT ROBOTICIZER." **__Sonic said to Tails in a mouth motion. Tails listened to the blue famous hero and smiled and made a mouth motion too._

"_**I'M GLAD THAT IT'S OVER. NOW AND WE CAN ENJOY THE REST OF THE WEEK." **__They fly in some clouds in the sky, about 30,000 feet from ground. Amy was listening to their conversation, smiling from Sonic and him being gorgeous with his skinny arms and small upper body and some real toned legs! She just sits there, looking at him and finally realizes that he is STANDING ON THE FUCKING WING! HOW DOES HE DO THAT?! _

_WHAT THE FUCK? I say. Amy thought about something and asked Sonic a question in a mouth motion._

"_**SONIC, HOW ARE YOU STANDING ON THAT WING SO EASILY?!"**_

_Sonic replied._

"_**I DON'T KNOW. GUESS IT'S SOMETHING ABOUT THESE WINGS THAT ARE SPECIAL." **__Sonic just stood there with a face that says you are thinking of something. What's that face called you ask? I don't know nor give a fuck. Anywhore, Amy took Sonic's word literally and decided to get on the wing. She unbuckled her seatbelt and got up from her seat to get to the other wing. Tails responds to this by mouthing out this:_

"_**AMY! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"**_

"_**I WANT TO TRY OUT THESE WINGS FOR MYSELF."**_

_Amy climbed on the other wing and stands on it perfectly without trouble. Amy mouth motioned words._

"_**THAT WAS EASY."**_

_But, while Amy said this, Sonic said something else….. In mouth motion._

"_**EITHER THAT OR I HAVE ON THE SPECIAL MAGNETIC SHOES TAILS MADE A COUPLE DAYS BACK."**_

_Amy had a sweat drop from what he said and mouthed out something VERY long that I felt too lazy to type. So, I'll do something basic._

"_**WHAT?!"**_

_Just as she mouthed that out, she fell off the plane in an instant. As she falls down back to mother earth, she screamed all the way. Tails looks down to see her falling and mouthed out, __**"SHOULD WE GO SAVE HER?!"**_

_Sonic opposed._

"_**NAH. SHE'LL BE FINE. JUST KEEP GOING."**_

"_**ARE YOU SURE?"**_

"_**YEAH. OTHERWISE, SHE WOULDN'T BE WATCHING THIS FLASHBACK RIGHT NOW."**_

"_**OH YEAH. OKAY…"**_

_The duo rode back to the Mystic Ruins in silence while leaving Amy to die, but hey, she's coming back. So, you know she didn't. Isn't that (que jazz hands) hypersoft-tacular?_

_**-END FLASHBACK….. BITCH-**_

The same wavy motion came back to the picture and got us back to the present, with color and sounds and shit. Amy tried to say something, but couldn't

"**I ALMOST GOT KILLED BY NATIVE WOLFS BECAUSE OF YOU TWO!"**

Amy broke the fourth wall and slapped me in the face. After the pain and suffering I've went through from that bitch slap of her iron hand, I put vocals back into the story.

"Thank you. As I was saying," Amy continued. "I almost got killed by native wolfs because of you two!"

"No way! With them iron legs and that giant hammer, I know you've kicked somebodies' balls and knocked some heads in, literally." Sonic said. Amy wanted to hit Sonic so baldy with her hammer, but she resisted since she loved Sonikku za Hejjihoggu. I just used his Japanese name, Swag. Anywhore, Amy still refused to sit in front of the Rottweiler, basically still bein' a bitch. Tails is now impatient and is just DONE with her.

"Amy, can you PLEASE get inside the passenger seat? NOBODY has time for this!" Tails said while pointing up in the air at the giant… thingamajigger shooting down rockets at buildings, destroying them. Hundreds of thousands of tons of toxic debris containing more than 4,000 contaminants, including known carcinogens, like azathioprine, benzene and aflatoxins, were spread across Mobotropolis due to the collapses. People were being evaporated and blown up by Eggman's zappers and KRMDs (Killer Robots of Mass Destruction). Everyone that is in pain and is suffering from loss of friends and family screamed for mercy and forgiveness to something that they've never done. They lost all hope in everything, thanks to the only bitch mentioned in the story so far: Amy.

"FINE! But, only because the author got me feeling bad!" Amy said, looking at me while I look good before she got on the biplane. She climbs into the thang and positions herself in front of John. He adjusted the way he sat and held her hips. He adjusted her to help her get comfortable. Amy felt comfortable for a quick minute before he wrapped his arms around her waist and puts his head on her shoulder, breathing softly on her check. She blushed.

"Um, do you mind giving me personal space?" She said, getting uncomfortable around the infamous black motherfucker behind her.

"You want to get more personal? Okay!" John said, before tightening his hold on her waist and moving more closely to her. He kissed her on the cheek, which got her very uncomfortable.

"Let go of me you perv!" She said, trying to leave his grasp, but it was futile since he was stronger. John looked all googly-eyed at her trying to leave his grasp. He put the side of his head on her back.

"Amy, why are you doing this to meeeeeeee? I thought we were in looooooooovvvvvuuuuuuhhhh!" John said, smiling at Amy, still trying to get out of his grasp.

"No you creep! Get off of me!"

"There's no time for you love-birds to be making kissyface right now! We have an already destroyed city to save!" Sonic said, being the badass he's not. While Amy still struggles to leave John's grasp, Tails started up the engines and went full speed on the ground. He started to ascend into the air and once he got up to the clouds, he went full speed to the giant thingamajigger.

Did I mention that there were also Dark Egg Legion thingamajiggers too? I'll tell you why I didn't mention the group in the first place…. Because I wasn't thinking about it like the stupid dumbass motherfucker I am. Anywhore…

-TO EGGMAN-

… Eggman still sits at his seat, laughing his face off at the video of Sonic getting knocked out by Amy's hammer. So I guess there is nothing new he-

_**BANG!**_ "Doctor Eggman! The Dark Egg Legion waits for you in the strategy room." Said Decoe with a cheap RPG-7 in his hand that blew up the extremely expensive looking door. Eggman stopped watching the addictive video and turned to him with blood-shot eyes.

"Bitch! I said don't come back until you got me information on that Rottweiler! And why the fuck did you blow my doors off?!" Eggman said, furious with the yellow robot with RPG in hand.

"What, I can't make an awesome entrance? Anyway, down there, somebody brought Krispy Kreme doughnuts. That's also something to tell y-"

"Yeah yeah yeah, I get it! I'll be there in a few minutes….. And get me a few of them doughnuts; I'm in the mood for powdered and glazed." Eggman commanded, turning around in his seat and going back to the video. "Ah, I'm going to show them this!" He said, referring to the video of Sonic getting slapped silly.

"Yes sir." Decoe walked away from the room. "Fatass." He mumbled.

-MANY HEARTY LUAGHS LATER.-

Eggman leaves his chambers with the security tape in hands and heads to the big meeting room, still giggling from the video I've mentioned too much to repeat again. He walked down a hallway and looked at his doorless chambers. "Computer, send some construction robots to fix my door."

"YES, DR. EGGMAN. SENDING S.C.R. DRONES TO YOUR CHAMBER." The computer made a 'bleep' sound. Next thing you know, Eggman sees about 10 bots working on the doors, speaking in very accurate Spanish to each other. It didn't take the robots long to replace the doors, it took about ten minutes to finish a thirty minute job. "Ah, thank you for Spanish Construction Robots." Eggman said, now leaving the area to finally get to the meeting. What happens in the meeting you ask yourself? You'll have to predict what happens while I give you the actual shit next time.

_**Sup, bros 'n' hoes! This is the author again. After 2 months of doing nothing but your mothers, I've finally find inspiration to continue my mother effin' story! I won't be updating a lot since I'm goin' to college. What college you ask? I'm goin' to "State Community College University Tech". It's goin' to be awesome! Anywhore, I'm about to turn up in a Wal-Mart, So, see y'all next time. LMFATS out.**_

_**AN #2 People who are of Spanish origin, to that joke about SCR, it's not to be racist, if you took it that way. I just know that you guys get the job done quickly and with quality and hard work, and that's why I like you guys.**_


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